Pain, Testimony, and Life's Lessons

We go through life running on fumes half the time. We get hurt, go through things, and then decide not to address them until things blow up in our faces and we are forced to face things. I wonder how many of us walk through life not addressing things that are bothering us?

I was thinking of this the other day. For some reason, Jesus in the Garden right before the Crucifixion popped into my head. He's knee bent, praying in the garden. The image we see is of him in great suffering. He knows what's getting ready to happen and he's petrified. He's hurt, and I'm willing to bet that this is the first time he has really had a chance to think about the pain he's about to experience. The thing that blows your mind is that he's been prepared for this his entire life. Everything he has every said, has ever done has led to this moment; but even Jesus did not address the thing that hurt him most until he had too - until he was ready. (Matthew 26:38) When he was ready, he got on his knees and prayed. He prayed for God the Father to help him through this pain. (Matthew 26:42) He acknowledged that he has to go through this pain, not for himself, not because he wanted it to, but because it was God's will. Once he acknowledged that it was God's will, he was able to finish his mission. He understood that while he was going through the pain, the lesson wasn't for him, but it was for the people coming after him.

We lose ourselves in the pain when we forget that our pain is our testimony. It is the thing that while we had to go through it, it is the example for someone else of what not to do or of what to do in the situation. We at too many times do not share our stories. The Early Church started because of everyone sharing their stories. Paul was always sharing what he was going through, what he had experienced. He did this to let people know that while he was Paul, this great leader, he was also human. He struggled with his flesh. Paul is famous for talking about his struggles with sin... "For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do." (Romans 7:19) He was constantly using his pain and suffering as encouragement for people. This, I'm willing to bet, helped him come to terms with what he was feeling; the pain he was suffering.

To be honest, this post started off talking about needing to recharge batteries. It started off talking about how there are times in our life where we need to take the time to be by ourselves to recharge our batteries. Maybe the way I needed to recharge my batteries was to think about pain..... Actually sit and think about the stuff I've been going through lately. Pray on it, and figure out what the lesson is behind it.... and Maybe.. just maybe... I'm not the only one who needs to recharge their batteries this way....

Hardest thing about change....

The idea of transforming into a better person is great. I mean we all want to change; we all want to be better today than the day before. We all want to transform ourselves into something different. The hard part in the midst of it all is keeping faith.

Faith is the hardest thing about change. Faith is the hardest thing to maintain throughout because you don't know what's going on. It's as you change that things seem to get darker and darker and darker. It's as you start to transform that it seems as if the dark clouds just keep coming and coming. It's always darkest before the dawn. In writing this, I find myself thinking about David for a number of reasons.

David, even though he was a man after God's own heart, had some dark nights. He was being chased.Saul wanted to kill him. He was living in the wilderness away from his wife, his family, and his best friend. He had to sleep in trees and in caves. He had to wait for signals in order to know when it was safe or when it was not..... This is just to name a few of the things he had to go through on his way to being king. You could argue that he had help and that he did not have to go through what he did alone - that he had others to help him out... Truth be told he was by himself. Truth be told he spent more time alone than with other people. In the midst of this he prayed. He prayed..... He prayed...... He still kept seeking after God. He learned to rely on him more in the midst of this than at any other time in his life. This is the period of his life from which the majority of the book Psalms come. They are comprised of David's personal testimonies and his praise. He is one of the many examples of people who figured out what to do in the midst of a dark night. He realized that while things were dark, the one thing he had as a constant in his life was God. He recognized that no matter what happened, no matter what was going on, God was still in the midst of it all. God was his strength, his deliverer. God was the thing in which he could trust... It was God who saved him from his enemies. It was God who never failed him. (Psalm 18).

We have to remember that if God is for us who can be against us. There are going to be times in which we go through fire. It is the fire that strengthens us; that hardens us; that forces us to examine our lives. We have to go through the fire in order to get rid of things in which are not good for us. We have to go through the fire in order to no longer rely on our own understanding of things. It's the fire that pushes us closer to God. But we have to keep faith. We cannot give up just when things are getting rough. God is doing a new thing in us, but we can not get to where he needs us to be if we give up. Faith is the most important thing in the midst of change. It's the thing that will get us through, especially when it seems as if God is not hearing our prayers; when we think he's not moving. It's the thing that we need most and yet it is the hardest thing about change.